1. We should have known the patient was going to be mean and ornery, he had different colored eyes; two of them were blue.
2. The patient started to settle down after he had been in the hospital for a week, we know because he finally starting waiving at the nurses with all five fingers.
3. The doctor put Sally on a diet, she's trying to get down to her original weight of six pounds and seven ounces.
4. You know you've had a tough day at work when you get home and try to open the front door of your home with your car clicker.
5. The stress level has gotten out of hand when you find yourself at lunchtime standing in front of the microwave yelling, "Hurry!"
6. You know you'll be working more than 40 hour work weeks when your first day on the job they issue you a badge, lap-top, cell phone and a sleeping bag.
7. The barista at the company coffee shop is getting a big aggressive. First his tip jar said, 'Thanks a latte', then it read, 'Feeling Tipsy?' now it has a big sign with, 'Don't make me put a bug in your drink!'.
8. My friends say that I'm think, pretty and smart...which is why, of course, they are my friends.
9. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef
10. Why don't cannibals eat comedians? Because they taste funny.
11. There ought to be more accurate names for deodorants. Why don't they have names like, Pitt Stop, No
Sweat, or for the deodorant that is so effective you don't even know it's there, Vice President.
12. Thought out to rename Starbucks to Steal-bucks.
13. I've got a frog in my throat; tastes like chicken.
14. Q: What did the cow name her baby calf? A: Patty
15. Q: How much did the cow's baby calf weight when it was born? A: A quarter pound
Visit Kelly's web site at http://KellyStaffingExpert.com see her blog, view jobs, and visit her store to buy her book, The Recruiter's Hiring Secrets. Also, in the store link you can send Kelly your resume for her to review and to make recommendations from her corporate recruiter perspective. Happy Job Hunting!
No comments:
Post a Comment